Think About It
by popegrant
Summary: Harm and Mac have another conversation post-Paraguay.
1. You would what?

Disclaimer: As usual, I don't own "JAG" or the characters, although I wouldn't mind using their talents.

Summary: It just came to me as I was recalling the past events and conversations between Harm and Mac this season.

**Think About It**

0346 ZULU

HARM'S APARTMENT

NORTH OF UNION STATION

Mac walked up to Harm's door.  It was late, but it was now or never.  "Harm, open up!"

"Mac?  What's wrong?  What are you doing here?"

"I…we need to talk."

"Now?!  It's almost…"

"Midnight, yeah I know, but…"

"Come on in.  What's on your mind?"

Mac had been lying in bed thinking about the past year.  Their friendship needed to be restored and she had come to the conclusion that she was the only one who could do it.  "Harm, I miss you."

"What do you mean?"

"I miss our friendship…and I want it back."

"I'll be honest with you Mac, I don't know if I can be just your friend anymore.  After Paraguay, things changed.  You moved on and so did I.  I just ended up where I started at.  It's not that I don't want us to be friends, but do you know how hard it was for me to walk back into JAG headquarters when you asked for my help?  Everyone had turned their back on me-"

"Well why did you come back then!?  If you didn't need us then why did you come back?"

"Because it's like you said when we were in Arizona, and I'll admit it.  I need JAG just as much as JAG needs me."

"I've asked you this before Harm, and you told me you didn't know, but I'm going to ask you again…Why couldn't we work things out between us?"

Harm was floored and he let out a soft chuckle.  "You ask me that?!  Mac you're the one that said never.  You're the one that made a unilateral decision that we would never work after I had given up everything for you and _you_ ask _me_ why we couldn't work things out between us?  I think you should be the one to answer that question."

"I'm sorry.  I didn't realize it at the time."

"I took what you said literally Mac, because I know you don't say things unless you mean them.  And as much as I hate to say this, or as much as I wish it could happen, you can't just take back those words."

"So you've never said anything you've regretted?"

"You know me better than that Mac, I say stuff all the time that I regret, especially as of late, but…I can understand the stress you went through, but I guess I still don't understand why you went to Webb."

"Like I said before Harm, he stated his intentions."

"I'm going to say this too and you can hit me or whatever, but think about it Mac, he was practically bleeding to death and he tells you he loves you.  Did you ever consider that he said those things to you because he thought he was going to die?  If he states his intentions so well, why didn't he just tell you before or some other time.  Instead, he brings you on a mission where you end up risking your life for him.  I mean come on, if I was on my death bed and you were there I would…"

"You would what Harm?"

"Nothing, it will only complicate things even more."

"This is your chance."

"Well you better stick around to hear my answer this time."

"Well…"

"I would tell you that I love you."  For the longest time Mac didn't say anything she just sat there staring at him.  "You see, it only complicates things."

"I love you too."

This is all for now.  If you like it I might continue.  Let me know, your opinions are appreciated.


	2. The end of the dance?

Disclaimer: I don't own "JAG" or the characters, if I did, things would most definitely be different.

Summary: Harm and Mac have another conversation post-Paraguay.

A/N: *Harm's thoughts.

**THINK ABOUT IT**

**Previously…**

"You would what Harm?"

"Nothing, it will only complicate things even more."

"This is your chance."

"Well you better stick around to hear my answer this time."

"Well…"

"I would tell you that I love you."  For the longest time, Mac didn't say anything.  She just sat there and stared at him.  "You see, it only complicates things."

"I love you too."

0423 ZULU

HARM'S APARTMENT

NORTH OF UNION STATION

Mac got up and walked to Harm's door.  "Mac, where are you going?"

"I need to go."

"Why?"  Harm didn't quite understand.  He had just told Mac that he loved her and she had said that she loved him too, so what was wrong?"

"I…"

Harm got up and walked over to his door preventing her from leaving.  He was standing between her and the door.  "Sarah, I can't let you leave.  I can't let you walk out of my life one more time.  I thought you wanted to end this dance."

"I do Harm.  Believe me I do."

"Then what's wrong?"

"Can you just give me some space?"

"Uh…yeah, but promise me you won't leave."

"I promise.  I'm just going to make some tea or something.  Do you want any?"

"Sure.  I'll be on the couch whenever you're ready."

"Okay."

Harm left her in the kitchen and went to sit on his couch.  She had come to him asking for their friendship back and he told her that he wanted more.  *Was that too much too fast?  But she told me she loved me too.*  He couldn't figure out what was bothering her.  

"Hey Harm, the tea's ready."

He got up off of the couch and went into the kitchen where she was.  "Thanks Mac."

"Sure.  Harm?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"For not letting me leave."

"I'm not going to pressure you into talking to me about this right now, but…"

"I'm ready."

"You sure?"

"Yeah."

"Do you want to go somewhere else?"

"No, here is fine."

"Alright."  Harm led her back over to the couch where he had once been sitting.  "What's going on Mac?"

"I don't know Harm.  I mean I do, but I don't.  Does that make sense?"

"Believe it or not, yes.  Well what makes sense?"

"My love for you, your being upset with everyone."

"So what doesn't make sense?  Me loving you?"

"I guess so."

"Why doesn't it make sense?"

"Because think about all the hurt I've caused you over the past eight years Harm.  How can you still love me?  After all the things I've said, how can you love me?"

"Sarah, that goes both ways.  If we rehash all the things we've said to each other in the past eight years, we'd spend the rest of our lives going over things.  I love you because of who you are.  Sarah, do you still not know why I resigned my commission?"

"Because you love me?"

"That's only half of it.  I had no other option.  I was having nightmares every night of how you and Webb would die and I knew something was wrong.  I can't live without you.  Don't you feel the same way about me?" 

"Yes, that's how I'm able to love you too, Harm.  When you were gone, Bud asked me if I missed you-"

"And you told him that you didn't."

"Yeah, how'd you know?"

"I talked to him once while I was gone and he told me."

"I did miss you Harm, I was just trying to move on."

"You don't have to explain it to me Mac, I understand.  So we're okay?"

"We've never been better Harm." 

He smiled at her and leaned in for a kiss.  It was one of promises and things to come.  At that exact moment…

"Harm?  Where are you?"  Mattie walked in on Harm and Mac kissing.  "Oh god, I didn't know you two…I'm leaving."

*Oh great!* "I guess I should go talk to her."

"That would probably be a good idea Harm."

"Don't leave."

"Alright."

Harm walked out of his apartment and headed down to Mattie's.  "Mattie?  Mattie where are you?"

"Here."

"What's wrong?"

"Sorry, I didn't know you and Mac were…"

"We had a talk."

"A talk?"

"Yes.  Come back."

"Are you serious?!"

"Yeah."

"You guys won't mind?"

"Mattie…"

"Alright."

"Come on."  They headed back down the hallway to Harm's apartment.  "Mattie did you want something?"

"Uh, I just wanted to talk to you about something."

"What?"

"It's nothing."

"It has to be more than nothing, what's up?"

"I'll talk to you later about it."  
"No…you came to me in the middle of the night wanting to talk to me and now it's nothing?  Come on in."

He opened the door and as Mac had promised, she was still there.  "Hi Mac"

"Hey Mattie.  Is everything okay?"

"Um…"

"She just needed to talk to me for a while."

"Do you want me to get lost?"

"No, you're not leaving remember?"

"Yeah, but if you need to talk to Mattie-"

"It's okay Mac, I don't mind."

"I can go in your bedroom, Harm."

"It's up to Mattie."

"It's fine Mac."

"Okay."  Mac went back into the kitchen to get something to drink.

"So what's up Mattie?"

"You said I could come to you right?"

"In your words…duh.  But yeah.  What's wrong?"

"I just had a nightmare that's all."

"What was it about?"

"I saw you drowning in the ocean."

"What happened?"

"You were flying a 14 and you crashed into the ocean, but you looked different."

"How so?"

"You were younger I think.  It's weird.  Harm, you're not going to leave me are you?"

*How does she know about my crash?*  "Of course not Mattie.  Come here."  Harm enveloped her in a comforting hug.  She had her head buried in his chest crying.  "It's gonna be okay Mattie."

Mac walked in at this moment and she just stood there watching Harm comfort Mattie.  "Hey Mattie?"

"Yeah?"

"I guess I need to tell you something."

"What?"

"I've crashed before like that, into the ocean."  
"What happened?"

Harm saw Mac and beckoned for her to come back into his living room.  "You okay?"  
"Yeah, she just had a vision."

At the use of the word vision, Mac's face paled.

"Harm what happened?"

"About three years ago, I was flying back to Mac's wedding when my plane went down in the Atlantic Ocean."

"You've been married before?"

"No, thanks to Harm."

"You stopped her from getting married?!"

"Involuntarily."

"Either you did or you didn't Harm."

"It's like he said Mattie.  It wasn't really on purpose, but it did work out for the better.  Did you just have a vision of Harm crashing in the ocean?"

"Yeah, but I guess it was then because he looked younger."

"Let's hope so."

"You two have a lot of stories to tell don't you?"

"Let's just say a lot has happened in the past eight years."

"Hold on."  
"What?"

"You two have known each other for eight years and you're not married?"

They both answered simultaneously, "No."

"But you are going to be the Mrs.Harm that me and Harm were talking about right Mac?"

*Who ever thought having a fifteen year old kid could-*  "You and Harm talked about who he was going to marry?"

"Not really Mac, she just said that she would like to have a Mrs.Harm someday?"

"And you came to the conclusion that I would be Mrs.Harm?"  
"Actually I changed the subject.  Mattie wants to be an aviator like me."

"I'll let you two get away with that one."

"I don't know about you two but, I'm tired."

"I'll go back."

"You can stay if you want.  You and Mac can have the bed and I'll take the couch."

"Are you sure, Harm.  I can just go back to my apartment."

"Mac, you're not driving across town at 0100."

"You better listen to him, he's stubborn."

"No more than you are."

"Okay you too, Mattie it looks like we've got the bed, Harm…"

"I'm positive Mac.  If not I'll take the floor."

"I'm going to go tell Jen where I am so she doesn't worry."

"Okay."  Mattie left and Harm and Mac were once left alone again.  "Goodnight Sarah."

"Night Harm.  Thanks again for not letting me leave."

"You're not going anywhere in the near future ninja girl."

"Neither are you flyboy."


End file.
